Baltimore Icemen

Baltimore Icemen

Team News

Icemen shut out Bears 1-0

Posted by: Paul Sampson on Mon Dec 16th 2013 3:09pm

In a game low on stats, John Nostradamus Weiss managed to fulfill his prophesy in getting 2/3 of a Gordie. Shortly after knocking a rebound out of mid-air for the only goal of the game early in the 2nd period, he managed to get himself tossed. After getting cross-checked from behind, John gave a little shove and a face wash back. The refs, knowing the Bear’s reputation quickly clamped down and escorted both players off the ice and the play settled sown. From then on, stingy defense and solid goaltending from the well-rested Steve Trostle managed to keep the Bears off the board and an Icemen win, extending our record to a respectable 3 -1 – 1 on the season. Getting the “W” and 2 points is the only stat that really counts when it comes down to it. The others are just for fun.

The other fun stat of the game was when Rob Heil took an inadvertent roughing penalty during a collision. Rob – you must realize that at this penny ante pace you will never catch Dash for the PIM Leader. In the ensuing penalty kill, the Icemen got a psychological edge by ragging the puck for almost the full two minutes. That, and Nate Schmoekel’s puck control and fore checking in the offensive zone frustrated the Bears were the other standout keys to victory. Ray Makowski’s defensive puck control matched Nate for frustrating the Bears as well.

The Icemen almost got an insurance goal but it was waved off by the ref even though he was in perfect position to see it go in. A rising slap shot from the top of the circle went off the goalies left shoulder and fell behind him across the goal line, where it rolled back a little so that it stopped with just a little bit of the puck on the goal line. Mats Berquist was at the goalie crease and saw it go all the way in. Mats, who knows a thing or two about creases and pleats like no other, should know. Fortunately, the insurance goal was not needed but would have been nice to have.

Firemen Hose Icemen 9 to 5 despite Mats’ 1st Hat Trick

Posted by: Paul Sampson on Wed Nov 20th 2013 4:04pm

7 lone & valiant Icemen had their hopes of a win go down in flames, put out by a full BCFD squad. At least we know now which guys on the team have no social life – being the only ones free on a Saturday night. The Icemen escaped the first period down only by one goal, 2 -1, via Mats Bergquist’s first goal of the night with 12.56 seconds left on the clock, fed in front by Tyler Spires. Just like in the past, we were running on fumes against a good skating team, falling behind 7- 2 by the end of the 2nd. The lone Icemen goal came sandwiched between 5 BCFD goals when Paul Sampson was forced wide and deep on a rush. Circling behind the goal, Paul fed a short pass to Mats driving to the net for a bang bang play.

Having the Firemen right where we wanted them – a little tired and over confident, the Icemen exploded for 3 fast goals in a 2-1/2 minute span to open the 3rd. It started when Paul forced a turnover near the boards at the red line, scooped up the loose puck and managed to slip one 5 – hole while doing a fireman carry with their defensemen draped on his back. A minute and a half later, Mats completed his hat trick, assisted by Chad Perkins and Tyler. Chad scored again a minute later, after being set up by Mats. This seemed to set off some flashing red lights and BCFD’s #28, who could go coast to coast almost at will, decided to add some insurance goals. The difference in the game was being too gassed to win races to loose pucks particularly in our own end, and we paid dearly for that. Dr. Bob stone walled them on several breakaways and odd man rushes. The most gratifying save came when #28 had a breakaway with 8 seconds left and got stoned. Thanks to Mats, Rob, Dr. Bob, Tyler, Chad, and Hayes for while not having a social life at least they aren’t whipped.

To a man, we all came away from the game looking forward to the re-match as we know with a full bench we can beat these guys. They were good sports and played a clean game. A welcome to D division is extended to the BCFD. Our next game is against the Black Aces on December 8th. Hopefully we should get a couple of guys off the DL with the long layoff over the Thanksgiving holiday.

Double Trick propels Icemen over APG

Posted by: Paul Sampson on Tue Nov 12th 2013 1:36pm

Rob Heil and John Weiss each scored a hat trick in a 9-1 decisive win over APG-D. Rob set the tone with 2 early goals. Jason Pasley also scored early to make it 3 – 0 after 5 minutes of play. After that, the Icemen never looked back. Rob completed his trick in the 3rd period. With 2 assist and a rough penalty he snagged his first “Gordie” of the season. John Weiss scored a natural hat trick with 3 successive goals spanning the 2nd and 3rd periods – two of which were nice back handers. Ray Markowski and Ronen Elefant rounded out the scoring.

Dr. Bob had his snooze button go off a couple of times to fend off a total of 15 shots, the result of playing most of the game in the other team’s end. The lone goal coming off a deflection that went 6 hole. Mats Bergquist had two assists on the night after a rough day when a mØØse bit his sister. (Mind you mØØse bites can be pretty nästi!) Chad Perkins and Tyler Lumberjack Spires also contributed with assists.

Letter to the Editor

Posted by: Paul Sampson on Wed Nov 06th 2013 12:42pm

Dear Sir,
I wish to complain on the strongest possible terms about the previous
Entry in this website about the Swede who wears womens' clothes. Some of
My best teammates are Swedish hockey players, and only a FEW of them are transvestites.

Yours faithfully,
Tyler Spires

P.S. I have never kissed a referee, even one of the female ones.

I never wanted to be a hockey player in the first place!
I... I wanted to be...
Leaping from tree to tree! As they float down the mighty rivers of
British Columbia! With my best girl by my side!
The Larch!
The Pine!
The Giant Redwood tree!
The Sequoia!
The Little Whopping Rule Tree!
We'd sing! Sing! Sing!


Oh, I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay,
I sleep all night and I work all day.

What's Up Doc? the 'ER Line' propels Icemen to 4-3 win over the Blue Crabs

Posted by: Paul Sampson on Tue Nov 05th 2013 1:26pm

The Icemen were matched up against another strong team for our second game of the season and emerged with a 4-3 back and forth win, thanks to the newly formed “ER Line”. Newcomers Nate Schmoekel and Ronen Elefant combined for 3 out of the 4 goals posted. Recruited by fellow Trauma surgeon and Icemen veteran Jason Pasley, the line made a strong debut. As expected, the defending first place champs Fighting Blue Crabs, came out strong and ready to play, taking an early lead halfway through the first period. The Icemen tied it up a few minutes later when Chris Black hit Paul Sampson with a stretch pass from deep in the corner to center ice where Paul beat the goalie low glove side with screened slap shot from the top of the circle.

The Crabs re-took the lead a minute into the 2nd period until Rob Heil drove deep and set up Ronen in front to tie it up again. The Icemen gained their first lead of the game late in the 2nd when Nate went wide and deep, drove towards the net and was able to slip one in short side. The Crabs tied it up early in the third in the evenly matched tilt. With 4.5 minutes to go, Nate put us ahead for good with a nice wrist shot from the faceoff circle. Full credit goes to the Crabs for a well-played game and to the entire Icemen squad that played a solid game. Sal provided his usual comic relief, particularly for the officials with his style of goaltending and reminding them how much better he is than he looked.

With 3 medical doctors now on the team, plus the PhD researchers, Mats noticed an important role missing and volunteered to be the team nurse, since he has the wardrobe for it already.

Last Game Result: Sep 24 2017

Team 1 2 3 F
Nordiques 0 0 0 0
Icemen 0 0 0 0
Goal Scorers: None
Goaltender: Connor McElwain (T)

Coming Up

Thu Oct 26th 2017 10:20pm
Game vs Bears
at Iceworld
Wed Nov 01st 2017 10:10pm
Game vs APG D
at Iceworld
Sun Nov 05th 2017 9:50pm
Game vs Stingers
at Iceworld
Sun Nov 19th 2017 8:15pm
Game vs Nordiques
at Iceworld
Sat Dec 02nd 2017 9:00pm
Game vs Bears
at Iceworld
Mon Dec 04th 2017 9:50pm
Game at APG D
at Iceworld
Sun Dec 17th 2017 9:20pm
Game vs Stingers
at Iceworld

Regular Season Leaders

Points 7 Players Tied 0
Goals 7 Players Tied 0
Assists 7 Players Tied 0
PIM 7 Players Tied 0
SO Connor McElwain 1
Wins Connor McElwain 0
GAA Connor McElwain 0.00
SV% Connor McElwain 1.000